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Sticking to New Year's Resolution
I personally don’t make New Year’s Resolutions anymore. I think that if you want to make a change in your life, act on it ASAP!
That being said, I made a year-long commitment to abstaining from alcohol in mid-January. It just so happens that the last drink I had was on New Year’s Day. I’m pretty proud of myself for making it this far 🙂
Did anyone stick to their resolutions and/or have any planned for the upcoming year?
Like you, I don’t make resolutions on specific calendar dates. I don’t decide to do something unless I’m sure I’ll see it through. The only recent resolution I made was to go nofap for a month, which was an interesting experience.
Congratulations on persevering with your no-alcohol commitment. When mid-January 2016 arrives, do you think you will be craving that first drink, or after a year will it be more like “meh”?
When I was in my 20s I gave up alcohol and caffeine for a few years, but I don’t have any reason to do things like that nowadays.
I’ve already planned to have a drink on January 1st! But, through this experiment I’ve decided to opt for no alcohol in most social settings. Hardly anyone minds. The ones that do end up disclosing that they themselves have issues with alcohol, and I’m comfortable with talking to them about it in more depth.
Haha, I’m nearly halfway through my 20s so maybe I’ll come to the same conclusions as you 🙂
As I think back a year ago, I actually did follow through on two things I resolved to do in 2015 — to start my blog on Liberty.me, and write approximately once a month, and to complete a cleanse. Next year? Nothing on tap as of yet.
Congrats on following through with those! There are always things to work on, so I’m sure something will come to mind soon 🙂
I don’t really do resolutions anymore, but I have shifted to goals or themes. I think James Altucher talks about themes. It’s a more open way of thinking about change and allows for shifting without the fear of failure hanging over you.
My themes next year: doing what I want, saying what I believe, health and happiness, practice everything.
I’m a fan of Altucher 🙂 Though I don’t recall coming across him mentioning this – do themes have mini goals within them? And thanks for sharing your themes! What did you mean by “practice everything”?
I think goals could be a part of themes, but I don’t think he’s a big fan of goals, more of just everyday improvement. He talks alot about improving by 1% a day.
By practice everything I mean instead of waiting for when I’m ready to do something, I need to just practice it, work on it. I need to do it, whether it’s pretty or not. Like how yoga is always a practice. For example, instead of committing to saying what I believe, where I will get upset with myself if I back down in a conversation or second guess what I say or say something wrong or don’t speak up, if I commit to practicing saying what I believe, then I’m more open to attempting and failure, and it’s less about me as a whole person and more about this one thing I am trying to do.
Practicing stuff has been a much more compassionate way for me to tackle things in my life. Workouts, journaling, healthy eating, reading and learning more, meditation. Once I started viewing things as a practice, it just got much easier. And if I screwed up (didn’t do a workout, didn’t journal, ate a whole cake) it was much easier to “get back” because I’m just practicing these things. And I don’t really feel like I “fall off the wagon” as much because the “wagon” is just me trying. And trying again. Practicing. Plus, it leaves room for constant improvement. There really isn’t an end goal, but rather just evaluating whether I want to keep practicing.
Ah, I like the mindshift aspect of this. Cool! Subtle but powerful.
I recall a conversation I had 6 months after I quit drinking. The person told me that 6 months wasn’t anything. He said that when I could say that I hadn’t had a drink in 10 years, now that would be something. (It has now been over 18 years since I last drank any alcohol.)
The point of a New Year’s Resolution is for self-improvement. If you didn’t have a prior problem with alcohol, then what have you accomplished by not drinking? And if you did have a problem with alcohol, do you really want to deal with the demons that accompany the drinking?
Perhaps a better question would be, what is your reason for not drinking for a year? How are you trying to improve yourself by not drinking? The drinking or not drinking is just a means to an end – what was the end you were striving towards? That is the resolution you need to be focusing on. (Or is the resolution not to drink a way of not having to face the real issues you’re trying to passive aggressively work on, without having to actually acknowledge and confront?)
All very good questions @bfarmer!
I didn’t have a serious problem with alcohol, though I would say that it was more of a problem with peer pressure. I’m generally assertive, but I noticed that I’d often fall into the trap of having “just one drink”, and then regret spending extra money for essentially no other reason than to fit in. So, this year I exercised my ability to say no to alcohol altogether. This included the 20+ conferences I went to where alcohol was free of charge and easily available. I also tend to over commit to responsibilities in general, and I’ve noticed that I’ve improved with that this year as well.
Now I’ve decided that alcohol has served its purpose in my life (in college, haha), so I’ll no longer go out of my way to have it. It’s been a good year 🙂
And congratulations on year 18! My year is amateur hour in comparison 😛
The longest journey begins with the first step. A year of not drinking for you is the same as a year of not drinking for me. Do not feel amateurish for it.
What I have found interesting, is that over the years my reasons for not drinking have changed. 5 years after I quit drinking, I didn’t drink for a different reason than why I originally quit. Now, I still don’t drink, but for still different reasons.
